Jillian and I celebrate our 13-year wedding anniversary today! March 12, 2005 seems like forever ago. My college students were 5 years old back then!
My wife and I have synergy in our relationship. Let me back up. I talk all the time to my students about synergy when it comes to business. This is the idea that the right combination of people / employees come together and are more successful than they should be. There is energy, there is passion, and there is a near perfect fit. It’s as if 2 + 2 = 5 in terms of productivity, morale, communication, and strategy. You see this synergy in young start-up businesses all the time. Facebook was like this in the beginning. It was ten students in a dorm room changing the way people interact with technology.
synergistic Relationships
You can also apply the concept of synergy to relationships. It’s all about finding your 2 + 2 = 5 relationship. That’s what I mean when I say my wife and I have synergy. Think about it this way:
We are all a bunch of “2”s walking around looking for love. Along the way, we date people hoping for the chemistry at the core of all strong relationships. Sometimes, however, we meet someone and begin to sense that the sum total of the relationship < 4, Let’s call it a 3, to be kind. Something important is missing and the experience is far less ideal than it should be. Besides, if we’re each a 2, then every dating relationship we have should at least hit the baseline of 4. For some reason we stay in these 2 + 2 = 3 relationships too long and often get married. At some point, we realize that the experience is forever destined to be a 3 and we live unhappily ever after or split up. Sometimes the math is fixable, but many times the math is too far off. The best advice I have for 2 + 2 = 3 couples is to try and find some synergy. And, if that proves too difficult after a period of time . . . then do each other a favor and exit Stage Right.
Find Your “5“
Other times, however, the sum total of a relationship can be greater than you think it can be, greater than people tell you it can be, and greater than your prior relationships have been. A relationship can = 5 when you find the right person. It’s the same concept as with a synergistic business – together, you need outstanding morale, communication, and a strategy for the future. There has to be passion, energy, and a near perfect fit – even in the bad times. You see this synergy most often where couples struggle together to be high character people. In fact, that’s the only way a couple can be / remain authentically happy.
There are tons of people out there, you just need to find the right one, the person where all this meshes seamlessly. Not perfectly, mind you, as that’s impossible. Stop seeking perfect relationships! But a fairly seamless fit is absolutely attainable. So . . . please, please don’t settle until you find your 5!
I married my 5, thirteen years ago. Love you Jillian Ciocchetti!!
Now . . . go find yours!
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